Movie – Jack the Giant Slayer: B-

jack the giant slayerB-
The combination of bad dialog, heaping tons of CG, and Ewan McGregor makes me amazed George Lucas wasn’t involved. The plot plods along a well-worn path littered with McGuffins and tired tropes. Lame humor, dull action, a boring story, and pale acting all add up to a film you’ll (happily) forget easily.


Movie – Snow White and the Huntsman: D

I have a love-hate relationship with trailers. The creator of this trailer is some sort of marketing wizard. It’s as though they created an awesome trailer, and then someone filled in the rest of the movie with the muck that made up the majority of this film. It was full of confusing scripting/editing choices, often ignoring potential to pursue its disjointed script. Kristen Stewart was awful (and certainly not “The Fairest”), Thor was barely acceptable, and Charlize Theron’s Queen seemed forced, though I blame the dialog and director.

Movie – Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides: B-

A fourth film was definitely not needed for this franchise. It brought nothing nearly as interesting as other films and its locales were less exotic. Voodoo zombies are nowhere near as cool as the skeletal pirates from the first film and ship-controlling Blackbeard is certainly no Squid-Face Davy Jones. Still, the acrobatic action scenes were as free-flowing as ever, but they just no longer dazzle.